In Love With Love
- Chelsie S.
- Feb 21, 2016
- 4 min read
Love fascinates me. I am intrigued by the complexities of people's adaptation to being loved both the right and wrong ways. I monitor the interactions of people who are paired in love and make a mental note of those things that work and don't work when it comes to birthing, maintaining, or reviving a healthy relationship.
Since my love has been on the platform I can't seem to escape the urge to delve deeper into my inner most thoughts and those of my partners to awaken those parts of love that are both flattering and unflattering. Every rose has its thorn, as the saying goes. Love is simple. Loving is easy, but somewhere along the lines of "falling in love" and "staying in love" people seem to over complicate things.
I am an analytical thinker, as is my partner. We analyze each other based on our actions, what we say, and body language. When your focus is caught up on all three things at once it's easy to get our wires crossed and misinterpret the love we are being asked to provide or the love we are wanting to receive. The more focus I put into myself -who I love, how I love them, and ensuring my mouth says what my actions produce -I begin to understand that although I say loving me is easy and I give love to all people; I'm revealing how untrue my statements have been based on the solidity of my affections toward persons aside from me.
Getting engaged and saying you'll marry a person is easy. Just as getting married and having your dream wedding is like unveiling the "happy ending" to your "fairytale". Love isn't a fairytale. Life after the wedding is not an "happy ending", but a New Beginning. I understand how exciting this phase in a woman's life can be, but I guess I'm just not your typical woman. Getting married and staying married is all that matters to me. I made a promise to myself, that before this chapter came to a close I will learn what I need to learn, seek out those things that no one ever wants to talk about, uncap the ugliness that is within me, and put it all on the table. No one knows how beautiful you truly are except for your partner. The person you marry should know everything about you. What makes you tick, what makes you smile, laugh, cry...those things that ignite fear, and those things that spark a fire to the flame that encourages your prayer life to go to a new level. He should know that when your fire is burning it's time to partner up and do what it takes to relinquish those things that started the fire in the first place. She should understand that paying attention to detail is one thing that matters most in any relationship.
I aspire to remove the veil before my wedding day and allow my partner to SEE ME and comprehend that although the road ahead may not be easy, it will always and forever be worth it. I will let it be known that LOVE is a requirement and although our love languages may be different, we will never stop learning one another's language. The 5 Love Languages is a book that has been suggested to me by a couple of different acquaintances. I never read it until today and I honestly wish I would've picked it up sooner. It's helping me understand how the love and affection needed for one person may differ from their spouse and how to evaluate yourself to figure out your own love language. Although I haven't finished the book I am relieved that I'm not the only person in the world who desires to be loved like me. I encourage anyone who is married or will be getting married, to get this book. It will honestly bless your life.
I encourage you to never stop working towards your goals. Never stop pursuing your spouse. Yes you may "have them" because you're married or are getting married, but just as quickly as you got them you can lose them. Remember that every day is a new opportunity to try again. Make loving your spouse a lifetime Goal -It's never ending, but it's achievable. Do what it takes to continually make sure your spouse knows he is loved, cared for, and appreciated.
As stated in the picture, reading makes me happy. I am my happiest when I'm alone in my room sitting near my little lamp and reading a novel that is both intriguing and educational. As I venture on my next level in love I will never stop learning how to love the right way and most importantly, how to be lovable. I can't always be a tender heart encapsulated in a cement casing. Now is the time to let my love show.
Side note: I use the term "partner" because my husband and I will be in a lifelong partnership. I believe marriage is a production of love based on the equal benefit of both parties maximum effort being put forth towards growing, maintaining, nurturing, and protecting the sacred union, of that which is their religious, spiritual, moral, and familial beliefs. There is no meeting halfway (50/50). We equally give our all or we have nothing at all.
Love,
ChelCy
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