A Letter To A Friend

A friend reached out to me a few days ago and told me everything was falling apart and they didn't know what to do. Here's my response... It's okay to cry and let your feelings out but the key is not to get weary and overwhelmed to the point where you want to give up. Scripture says Galatians 6:9 KJV [9] And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. It's extremely hard to stay positive when it seems like your world is going through a whirlwind of problems. Lately I've been GOING THROUGH. It seemed as if nothing could ever go right or "go as planned" but the keyword is I was and I'm still GOING THROUGH, I'm not stagnant, nothing has stopped, yeah a few situations may have changed and things haven't gone as planned, but I'm still living, I'm still waking up everyday, God is still working behind the scenes (I may not see it now, but as a believer I'm going to trust that he's working on my behalf). For example, it was hell getting back into school after being expelled (yes I got expelled) but Gods grace and favor worked things out for me and made it so that I got back in school. How do I know? My advisor literally told me I'm lucky, when I got expelled for some reason my academic suspension contract worked in my favor and I was able to get back into school (since 2013 when I last attended school the department I was being advised in is no longer existent, policies have been changed). I knew then that only God had the power to do that. I got in, got my classes, started school and found out that my financial aid wouldn't go through because my freshman year I got some loans and they went into deferment. I thought I had my loans situated because all my loans were with one company, but come to find out I had one somewhere else I didn't know about and it went into deferment. I had a guarantor on it and they paid it for me when my lender realized I wasn't paying it. So now I owe my guarantor the full amount of the loan. 😑. I explained my situation and they said I needed to make good faith payments for 6 months before they will notify my school that the Loan was out of deferment. My schooling has always been paid for because I'm adopted, but within the past 2 years a law has been passed that says the waiver will only cover 30hrs towards a degree and you have to maintain a 2.5gpa in order to receive it. I'm in my junior year so that disqualified me alone because I have 70+ hours. So I got distraught and really discouraged. I cried and asked God why would you let me get this far if you knew I wouldn't be able to pay for it. My business is going through a summer slump, bills are piling up, and now this? Well school started and the first drop date for non payment past. I paid $0 for my two classes and bought my books. After a few weeks of class I woke up and logged on to turn in an assignment for my class and it was gone. Nowhere to be found. I checked my email and it said classes would be dropped the previous day at 5pm for non payment. I had no idea they were going to drop my classes. I had an A in that class. So I looked at the school website to see when the drop date was for summer 3. I said well I'll get a job by then and I'll be able to pay something on it. The drop date rolled around, I prayed they wouldn't drop my class... The next morning at 2am I checked blackboard and my class was gone. I had an A in that class too. I got really depressed and heartbroken. I said God why did you take this away from me? You knew how hard I worked, I studied all night I'm doing my assignments and turning them in on time... Why would you let this happen to me? You know what I realized, it wasn't God who did it to me. I can't blame God for what man did. He held up his side of the deal, he said he'd give me the desires of my heart, he did that. My desire was to get back in school and finish so I can get my degree. He made a way for me to get back in school, it was my responsibility to stand up and do what it took in order to pay for it when I had the opportunity to. I honestly thought they did things like they use to where if you didn't pay they'll put it on your account and you can't start the next semester until you pay off your bill (I WAS WRONG LOL). Sometimes we get sad and mad and depressed over things we have complete and total control over. Scripture says, James 2:14-18 MSG [14-17] Dear friends, do you think you'll get anywhere in this if you learn all the right words but never do anything? Does merely talking about faith indicate that a person really has it? For instance, you come upon an old friend dressed in rags and half-starved and say, "Good morning, friend! Be clothed in Christ! Be filled with the Holy Spirit!" and walk off without providing so much as a coat or a cup of soup---where does that get you? Isn't it obvious that God-talk without God-acts is outrageous nonsense? [18] I can already hear one of you agreeing by saying, "Sounds good. You take care of the faith department, I'll handle the works department." Not so fast. You can no more show me your works apart from your faith than I can show you my faith apart from my works. Faith and works, works and faith, fit together hand in glove. I had the faith part down packed but what was I doing to ensure that my faith was working for my purpose aside from crying and feeling bad for myself? Nothing. It wasn't until I was alone and found a place where I could have peace and really cry out to God that I realized my faith was slipping. I had faith, but only when things were going right...at my church we're taught to fight the fight of faith, we are taught what to do and how to do it when you're in the midst of a faith fight and I literally was at a place where I could no longer fight. I knew I needed God when I cried out to him and asked him to take me away from this place. My business is going through a drought, I'm in the midst of moving but I don't know where to because my current living situation is no longer secure, then on top of that the one thing that was giving me hope was taken away from me... I said God I'm tired of fighting, I've been fighting my entire life, when will I have some peace?! I was ready to go. I just didn't want to deal with life anymore. You know what he did? He woke me up the next morning. I said okay well you woke me up so I have some purpose here. There's something in this earth that I am purposed to do, so I'm going to give this faith thing one last try. I'm going to submit myself completely to you. I'm cutting off everything that influences me to sin (people included) so at least if I get to my breaking point again I can honestly say God I've lived in complete and total righteousness with you so now what....man keeping the faith when your world is crumbling takes strength, perseverance, and true commitment. My question to myself was do I have real faith or fake faith? Real faith is trusting and leaning on the word of God no matter what...fake faith is that faith you have when the time is right and you're around the right people. That faith people have on social media when you know their life doesn't align with the will of God but they "say" they living the God life. I want that real faith again...I will admit, I've stumbled but I've also committed myself to get my life back and get back into the will of God for my life. It's sooooo hard to live without God. For years when I lived for God I had the peace you read in that scripture that says God will give you peace that surpasses all understanding. I had indescribable peace. Nothing anyone could do or say to me had any effect on me because I had Gods peace...that's so amazing! My questions for you are: 1.) What's wrong? What do you feel isn't going right that should be going right? 2.) What have you done to fix it? 3.) Do you believe in God, are you saved, and do you trust God? 4.) Do you know how to fight the fight of faith? These are the questions I asked myself. Pastor Khalis said something powerful the other day he said, "when you pray ask God to help you with your unbelief". It's possible to be a believer who still battles with unbelief. So it is my prayer that you do what it takes in your life to allow God back into your life. So much so that when it seems like all hell is breaking lose around you, you maintain your peace and undisturbed composure. Why? Because God didn't give you the spirit of fear, anxiety, depression, or disgust...that comes from the enemy. ““If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds. “Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them. “If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. “Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭6:25-34‬ ‭MSG‬‬ That's the bible, that's the book. Trust God Always Chels. Love, ChelCy